Lesson #1

I am a piece of work. Pretty ridiculous, even.

For the past few days I’ve been fighting off feelings of self-pity, worthlessness, and failure. I’ve been so focused on what I don’t have that I lost sight of what I do have. Why is it that when one little thing goes “wrong” in life, we suddenly forget all that continues to go right? I mean, to an outsider looking in, I pretty much do have everything going for me: I’m young, fit, attractive, healthy, alive! I have a great family and great friends, a job, a college degree, a vision for my career, a roof over my head. I have no reason to sulk! But wait…I’m an overachiever. If I don’t have what other people have, then that must mean I’m not measuring up, right?

Wrong.

It finally dawned on me last night that life is not a contest. I repeat – more for my own benefit than anything else – LIFE IS NOT A CONTEST!!! No one is pointing fingers at me for not being in my career yet or being married or paying a mortgage. In fact, people are praising me and my current place in life. They are telling me that I’m smart for pursuing the education that I am now; that at least I know what I want to do with the rest of my life, and that what I want to do actually means something to this world; that I’m wise for not settling down so young. So why on earth am I being so hard on myself?

Oh, right…fact #8: I am too hard on myself.

It’s high time I give myself a break. It’s high time I start acknowledging what I do have. It’s high time I start acting a little more grateful because if I don’t, then I surely don’t deserve to have all that I do.